The Write Timing

My voyage toward publication

Far from Perfect June 30, 2015

Filed under: Funny Things — michellephillips @ 3:16 pm
Tags: , ,

I’m intrigued by birth order.  In college, my Honors thesis focused on how birth affected students in the classroom.  As a teacher, I like to find out which of my students have which birth order positions and see if their personalities match typical birth order characteristics.  I like talking about it in passing with friends.

Any idea what birth order position I hold?

Yep.  Oldest.

The perfectionist.  The pleaser.  The rule follower.

Check.  Check.  Aaaaaaaaaand CHECK.

I like things to be “just so.”  My closet (organized by style and color).  My lesson plans (objectives in bold; left aligned).  My diaper bag  (tissue/Boogie Wipe/pacifier pocket should not be confused with diaper/wipe/changing pad pocket).

I don’t like to disappoint people.  If I just went to the store to get my groceries for the week, and my sister asks if I want to go to the Farmer’s Market, I will probably say yes even though I already have everything I could possibly need.

And rules?  Don’t even get me started.

But let me tell you about how far from perfect this oldest child is in one lovely example.

A few weeks ago, my cousins and I decided to get together for a play date.  We each have a child under the age of two and got together so the kids could play (and realistically, so the four of us could talk to other adults).  I was going to pick up something to bring, but the morning of our play date, thought – Hey!  I have an apple cake mix.  I can just whip that up really quickly.    And you know what?  I had apples.  I had time while Baby O napped.  So I did it!  I brought freshly baked apple bars to our play date.  They were delicious.  Everyone enjoyed them, including my darling daughter who ate one crumb by crumb.

Now you’re probably thinking – Michelle!  That sounds pretty perfect (except for the part where you gave your daughter sugar – shame on you!).  But that’s not where the story ends, my friends.

Oh no.

Because my delicious apple bars were not gone when I left my cousin’s house.  I still had about 1/3 a batch left.  But guess how perfect this was?  I was meeting up with some friends that same night to watch The Bachelorette.  So I sliced some apple bars, arranged them on a cute little platter, covered them with foil, and headed out to watch Kaitlyn make out with hoards of men (but it’s okay guys, she has to know if they have chemistry).

My husband and I left at the same time.  I grabbed the bars, dropped some cans in the recycling bin, tossed the diaper bag in the backseat, and nestled Baby O in her car seat.  Daddy followed us out of the neighborhood.  As we merged onto Dodge Street, I noticed a silver bird head straight for my husband’s car and just nearly miss!

What was that?!  I thought.  What a strange phenomenon.  It’s not every day you see silver wings take flight.


I felt the seat next to me for the apple bars.  The 6 apple bars that would have been the perfect complement to Chris Harrison.

But why would they have been next to me, when they looked so nice on the shoulder of the road?



4 Responses to “Far from Perfect”

  1. Jill Hunter Says:

    Love it! They were delicious!! I’m always fascinated by birth order and seeing if people match those descriptions as well. It fascinates me! Probably bc I’m also the oldest 😉

  2. Matt Says:

    So what does it say about the youngest child?

    • Youngest children can be outgoing and fun-loving, though sometimes manipulative as children. As adults, they tend to go with the flow – which I think fits you pretty well! I have yet to find the data that supports youngest children insisting upon flinging their nieces into the air right after they’ve eaten, but I’m sure it’s in there somewhere! 😉 Check out the links on my post for more info, bro!

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