I’ve been meaning to get back to my writing. Truly, I have. Writing for Pregnancy and Newborn’s Knocked Up blog (find my posts here!) made me feel like a real live writer, and that’s a feeling I had been longing to have for a while. You’d think I’d be more motivated to write every day. But, you see, there is other important work I’ve been doing.
In fact, it’s much more important work.
It’s the work of being a mother.
And I don’t just mean the washing of bottles and the changing of diapers. Sure, all of that is part of it (especially the diapers part – I have two kids under age 2 after all!), but it’s not the real substance of motherhood.
I’ve been busy loving them.
My two little dreams come true. I’ve been busy holding my tiny baby so close that it feels like our hearts have one beat. Kissing his cheeks over and over; willing him to feel the immensity of my love. Staring at his perfect face and listening to the gentle snores that sound sweeter than music. Letting his chubby hand grasp my finger and keeping it there just to be close to him. Still holding him an hour after he’s finished eating, just so I can watch him sleep and take in his beautiful baby smell. I’ve been savoring these precious baby moments because I realize they are so fleeting.
And then there’s her. The beautiful girl who made me a mother. His big sister, who is really still a baby herself. But who is also wanting to be such a big girl. I’ve been talking to her, listening, even when I don’t understand a word of it. Playing with her babies and giving them so many kisses when she asks. Huddling into her play tent. Reading the same book three times in a row just because she loves it. Embracing the moments she’s sleepy and wants to be carried upstairs, so I can steal the cuddles she used to give so freely. Loving her up as much and as often as I can.
So yes, I’ve been wanting to write. But right now, I have much more important work to do. I’m loving my babies.